Revising your Message: Evaluating the First Draft

Ricky Brackett

October 31, 2011

MAN 131

                                    Revising your Message: Evaluating the First Draft

            Today I want to discuss with you about revising your message. After you have completed

a first draft you may be tempted to be breathe a sigh of relief, send the message on it’s way, and

move on to the next project. We all know that successful communicators recognize that the first

draft is rarely as tight, clear, and compelling as it needs to be. Sometimes we have to be careful

of what we write because it will be revised . Careful revision can mean the difference between a

rambling unfocused message and a lively direct message that gets results. Depending on your

writing and the medium and the nature of your message revision task can vary somewhat. When

using instant messaging, text messaging, email, or blogging, the revision process is often as

simple as quickly looking over your message to correct any mistakes before sending or posting

it.  A lot of times we fall into the common trap of thinking that you don’t need to worry about

grammar, spelling, charity, and other fundamentals of good writing when you use these media.

Most of these qualities can be very important in electronic media particularly if these messages

are the only contact your audience has with you. Poor quality message create an impression of

poor quality thinking and can cause confusion, frustration and costly delays. To complex your

messages try to put your draft aside for a day or two before you begin the revision process so that

you can approach the material with a fresh eye.

            Making sure that you have accomplish your goal start with the picture before moving to

finer points, such as readability, clarity, and conciseness. When you begin the revision process,

focus your attention on content, organization, style and tone. From the textbook at my

Management class according to Bovee and Thill to evaluate the content of your message answer

these questions: “ Is the information accurate? Is the information relevant to the audience? Is

there enough information to satisfy the readers needs?”  When you are satisfied with the content

of your message ask yourself some few questions like Are all the points covered in the most

logical order? Would the message be more convincing if it were arranged in another sequence?

And also are any points repeated unnecessarily? Next consider whether you have achieved the

right tone for your audience. Spend  a few extra moments on the beginning and end of your

message these sections usually have the greatest impact on the audience.  Be sure that the

opening is relevant interesting, and geared to the reader’s probable reaction. Before you dive into

someone’s else’s work recognize the dual responsibility that doing so entails. If you try to edit or

revise without knowing what the writer hoped to accomplish, you run the risk of making the

piece less effective, not more. According to Bovee and Thill to evaluate someone else’s writing

ask these questions: “What is the purpose of this document or message? Who is the target

audience? What information does the audience need? Does the document provide this

information in a well organized way? Is the tone of the writing appropriate for the audience? Is

the writing clear? If not, how can it be improved? Is the writing as concise as it could be? Does

the design support the intended message?

            Substance refers to the content of the essay and the message you send out. It can be very

hard to gauge in your own writing. One good way to make sure that you are saying what you

think you are saying is to write down, briefly and in your own words, the general idea of your

message. Then remove the introduction and conclusion from your essay and have an objective

reader review what is left. Ask that person what he thinks is the general idea of your message.

Compare the two statements to see how similar they are. This can be especially helpful if you

wrote a narrative. It will help to make sure that you are communicating your points in the story.

A message also has to have a structure and in order to check the overall structure of your essay,

conduct a first-sentence check. Write down the first sentence of every paragraph in order. Many

people think only of mechanics when they revise and rewrite their compositions. As we know,

though, the interest factor is crucial in keeping the admissions officers reading and remembering

your essay. Look at your essay with the interest equation in mind: personal + specific =

interesting